I Love Coffee

Seriously...a well-made caramel latte or a big cup of strong Ethiopian coffee (black and sweet) is one of my favorite ways to start the day.  Right now, I'm sitting outside (freezing!  It's yard sale day and it's way to cold to be outside right now)...drinking my first cup of coffee in 10 days and it's glorious.

So why would I give up coffee for a week and a half?  Good question...started this way.  I was having a conversation with someone recently about addiction.  There are tons of stuff that we have around us that are not intrinsically bad.  Alcohol, tobacco, caffeine, prescription meds, legal drug substitutes and even food are just a few of these.  Most people believe that there's no problem with having a glass of wine with dinner, but most would also say that something's wrong if you need a beer to start the day right.

So anyway, back to the addiction conversation...I happened to say (insert spiritual voice here):

"There's a problem if we need any substance (legal or otherwise) to help us feel normal."

And then it hit me...I was drinking somewhere between 30 and 36 ounces of coffee and  a couple sodas every day.  Is there anything 'wrong' with that?  Who knows?  But ultimately, I decided that it might be a good idea to take a break from the drug (yes...caffeine=drug).  Sara could tell you...the first couple days I was not very fun to be around...standard horrible headaches and irritableness.  That should highlight the issue that maybe it's not a great idea...or maybe stopping was the great idea :).

What's the point?  Just trying to reflect on the thought that maybe we shouldn't  be relying on stuff that has no real nutritional value to help us reach a state where people want to be around us.  I'm not going to stop drinking coffee...but hopefully with a little moderation from now on.  That'll do...

Why, not What

Many people think that the things we do here on this earth follow us…that our legacy is defined by our actions.  I think this is right to an extent, but slightly off.  WHAT we do is far less important than WHY we do it.  Revelation 14:13 says “Blessed are the dead who die in the Lord from now on.”  Dying is one of those things that don’t really help anyone unless we’re dying for something greater than ourselves.  The soldier that dies defending his country or the father that dies protecting his children are heroes.  But all that is nothing compared to a life that is dedicated to God in the light of persecution.  
Most of us have no clue what persecution really is…but we’re talking about Revelation here…people being killed for not worshiping the image of the beast (15:15).  I’ve heard that some churches in developing countries actually pray for persecution of the American/Western church…not because they hate us or anything like that, but because they truly want us to experience the ‘joy of suffering’ and be forced to consider our motives, instead of just our actions.  
Recently, I’ve been thinking a lot about this…do we choose to do good and kind things, or avoid those things that could hurt others because it seems like the moral or convenient thing to do?  Or do we do it because we’re in love with the God who put thought into every microscopic detail of creation and allowed his son to die for us?  Should we make role models of those who donate millions of dollars to charity, or the addicts who get clean, if they're living a life dedicated to something other than God?  Do we live in America, or do we live (and die) in the Lord?

I want more

So I'm up early today because I'm supposed to be studying for a final...but this thought has kind of captured my mind the last few days/weeks/months and I've got to put it down.  How many of us are satisfied in our 'relationship' with God?  I put it in quotes, because I think it's become a buzzword that believers love to use...but it doesn't mean anything to a lot of us.  Most of the time, I'm just kind of stuck in this state where I believe in God, but I don't connect with him...and I want more than that!  What kind of true relationship is satisfied in stagnancy and a lack of connection?  I was talking to a friend yesterday about this frustration...this whole thing where I want to be closer with God, but don't really know how.  It's like I'm trying to force myself to love him more.  Last night, I saw this prayer (from A.W. Tozer) in the book 'Crazy Love' by Francis Chan (which I highly recommend).  It's old-school thees and thous, but it just encapsulates this whole idea that we cannot fabricate love for God...even that love is a gift of grace from him...

O God, I have tasted Thy goodness, and it has both satisfied me and made me thirsty for more.  I am painfully conscious of my need for further grace.  I am ashamed of my lack of desire.  O God, the Triune God, I want to want Thee; I long to be filled with longing; I thirst to be made more thirsty still.  Show me Thy glory, I pray Thee, so that I may know Thee indeed.  Begin in mercy a new work of love within me.  Say to my soul, ‘Rise up my love, my fair one, and come away.’  Then give me grace to rise and follow Thee up from this misty lowland where I have wandered so long.